Shopping on Base….for a husband?!?

Jo had some extra time for lunch; she had enough time to meet me at the gate, sign me in, and escort me back to the gate after lunch.  Prior to our meal at the foodcourt, we shopped around the NEX (Navy Exchange=everything is discounted and tax-free. )  I suppose some of you would call me a ‘lipstick lesbian.’  I hate the cliché term, but love my makeup, dresses and handbags, so you certainly aren’t wrong.  The NEX is truly one of my most favorite parts of being an illegitimate Navy 'wife.'  Jo must accompany me in and out of the store as I am not able to carry a military id; however, it is Heaven all the same.  Where else, for a discounted rate, can you pick up a new computer, flat screen TV, and bohemian style purse?  No matter how many times I go, the experience is blissful.

Post power shopping, our appetites called and to the food court we went.  We bumped into a couple of Jo’s co-workers and they were amped to have lunch with her and her very girly “roommate.”  Small, petite and not so Navy-like, Kiki might be the most upbeat person I have ever met.  Her boyfriend, Luke, thinks he is an all-American dream.  They are the kind of military couple you could picture sitting on the back of a red pick-up with seven brats dressed up in red, white and blue.  But Kiki means well; I think.

I used to get nervous around men and women in uniform; however, the fascination and intimidation is slowly wearing off.  Despite our new lunch companions, my bliss from the NEX was still radiating.   For better or worse, I was more myself at lunch than I have ever been with Navy personnel.  I talked endlessly about my love of the exchange.

Jokingly, I told Kiki, “Oh my God, I’m joining the Navy, just for the discounts!”

Kiki responded, “No way!  We just need to find you a hot Navy man.”

BLOW. To the Gut.

In essence, mission accomplished.  I’m the cute, quirky, “single and straight” roommate of their favorite classmate.  Unfortunately, even if we did achieve at fooling everyone at lunch, it was a blow to my wifely ego.   How many more times in my life will I need to pretend I’m looking for a good man?

KIKI, if you are listening, thanks for the offer but I must pass, I have a great (hot) WOman.