2/20/10

What Should You Be?

"Be who you are," said the Dutchess to Alice, "or, if you would like it put more simply, never try to be what you might have been or could have been other than what you should have been." (Lewis Carroll)

It's been awhile since I just wrote.  No agenda, no plea to end Don't Ask, Don't Tell...just me and my crazy thoughts about life.   I can feel that I haven't been writing enough. There is a serious difference in my energy when I do.

I don't know if I've ever shared my professional background with you.  Prior to moving with Jo, I had my 'dream' marketing job.  The money was right, I had my own corner office and fabulous benefits.  The position was exactly what I "could have been." It was the best job I have ever had, yet I was miserable.  My daily professional existence sucked all of my creative drive.

I've always wanted to write in order to touch hearts and make lives better, mostly those of anyone feeling lost and lonely.   I was so confused and sad during my teenage and college years. By sharing my experiences with depression and coming out, I hope that others won't feel they are on their own. And now again, I am in a situation where I often feel invisible.  I write about our life under Don't Ask, Don't Tell so those of you going through it won't feel so alone.  We're in this together. 

With that said, I have always believed I would do this on some sort of large scale.  I don't want to reach just one or two people, but really be a voice for a generation.  I lost this dream for a long time.  It is so fucking scary to admit that you want to go out on a limb.  That you want to achieve greatness. That you want to leave everything you could be, and be everything that you are.  Especially, when somewhere along the way, you may have lost yourself.  Slowly but surely, I'm getting back in touch with my dreams.

And that's where we are now.  Jo works crazy hours, achieving her grand dreams and providing for us so that I can achieve mine.  She believes in me. Some days, lately most days, I have been letting my fear of failure (and lack of fiscal contribution) get the best of me. The only thing left? For me to believe in myself.  This is the key hurdle between us and our dreams, isn't it?

So I remind you again, of the Dutchess' words, "Never try to be what you might have been or could have been other than what you should have been."

Unsure of what I "should be doing" to attain my crazy dreams, I will continue to have passion each  day, write from my heart and simply be true to who I am.

2/9/10

End Funding of DADT Discharges


Sometimes, I really think we need to move out of this country.  Our lack of equal rights disgusts me and the politicians often disappoint. Checking the morning news, I stopped at LezGetReal to see Bridgette LaVictoire's post about Senator Gillibrand's amendment to end the funding of DADT discharges.  I clicked ahead with anticipation of a formal announcement.

Gillibrand is indeed proposing this amendment. Unfortunately, her intention-her integrity-has been questioned.  Bruce Blakeman, an opponent against Gillibrand for the US Senate in NY, believes  Gillibrand is simply trying to impress voters at this point in time. Blakeman stated, “Sen. Gillibrand’s actions are nothing more than political grandstanding in an election year. The Pentagon is examining the policy and will make a recommendation in the future. Attempting to short circuit the process to score cheap political points is irresponsible. … We are a nation at war and the last thing our troops fighting overseas need is for politicians back home to be placing their political ambitions before the mission.....Sen. Gillibrand should encourage a full and honest debate by our military leaders in determining whether “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” is a policy that should be continued or repealed.”

THE LAST THING, Mr. Blakeman, OUR TROOPS FIGHTING OVERSEAS NEED is to HIDE THEIR FAMILIES.  The LAST THING these troops need is one more year of FEAR.  
Blakeman's comments are unfounded, inapporopriate, and an attempt at media attention- shoot! He just got what he wanted, I'm writing about it- again-for LGR.

As a member of the GLBT community that Gillibrand defends, I have never questioned her integrity.  I appreciate her consistency, action and determination for our equal rights. I understand that things need to be done 'right' but words are no longer enough. I wish they would offer an olive branch in the form of defunding of discharges. While the Pentagon 'examines' the matter, Senator Gillibrand proposes an amendment that could immediately ease our fear and set the end of Don't Ask, Don't Tell in motion.

In regards to Bruce Blakeman- if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all.

Don't forget to call the White House, friends.

2/7/10

CBS Denies Gay Super Bowl Ad

Jo left early for work this morning so I've been catching up on the news.  My peaceful Sunday morning disrupted with some Gay Hate. 

Super Bowl Sunday and I'm already annoyed.  I don't even watch the game!  A former marketing guru, I tune in to the Super Bowl each year to watch the commercials.   CBS determined which controversial ads they will not air this evening. The Victim? ManCrunch

Clearly, I'm not too familiar with male dating websites, but as far as I can see, this one is no different than Match.com, except for their homosexual focus.  I will admit ManCrunch's commercial is a little racy with two men in jerseys touching hands over a bowl of chips leading to an abrupt makeout session.

But aren't Super Bowl ads typically the most divisive?

Oh wait- I forgot.  CBS did accept one controversial ad-the anti-abortion commercial featuring the mother of quarterback Tim Tebow.  So is it safe to say CBS would rather have children asking their parents about abortion rather than why two boys are kissing?


Check the ManCrunch Commercial

2/2/10

End DADT in 332 Days: Call the President, Demand Change

For anyone who may have missed his speech last Wednesday, President Obama mentioned Don't Ask, Don't Tell (DADT); he stated repeal would occur "This Year." The following day in Tampa,  referencing a moment before the 2008 Presidential election, President Obama quoted himself, "Change never comes without a fight."

We may have some initial, actual progress. The first DADT hearings in seventeen years will began today.  Robert Gates declared "The question before us is not whether the military prepares to make this change, but how we ... best prepare for it. We have received our orders from the commander in chief and we are moving out accordingly."

Although Gates plans to establish a panel to study the issue, this could take a year or more.  Unfortunately, when asked if the military would provide a moratorium on discharges, Gates responded poorly, "I'll get back to you on that."

Together, we will end Don't Ask, Don't Tell in 2010.  There are 332 days left.
Jo and I encourage all of you to write, call, protest and pray



A GREAT Message from SLDN:

Call the White House Switchboard

Call the White House switchboard at 202-456-1414 and tell the president to: Phone

     >  Make good on his commitment to end "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" and include repeal in his defense budget
     >  Partner with Congress so that we can get repeal done in 2010

Example Script for Your Call
Hello, my name is __________ and I'm calling from __________ (city, state).

I'm calling to urge President Obama to keep his promise to end "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" and include repeal in his defense budget. This discrimination is wrong. Firing qualified service members simply because they're gay needs to stop in 2010. Thank you. 



Movements for Change

Servicemembers Legal Defense Network

http://www.sldn.org/

Voices of Honor Campaign
HRC, Partnering with Servicemembers United on a National Tour to Repeal DADT

http://www.hrc.org/sites/voicesofhonor/index.asp


Campaign for Military Partners
Servicemembers United leads this initiative to reach out to, recognize, connect, and support the partners of active duty gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender military personnel
http://militarypartners.org/
SLDN

Don't Ask, Don't Tell Story Project
http://www.kirstengillibrand.com/dadtstoryproject.com/

Resource and Reality Check
http://dadtarchive.org/
Take a look at how many have been discharged for being who they are.